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capture； shut his eyes when his Lordship came in。
Lord Decimus； nevertheless； was glad to see the Member。 He was also
glad to see Mr Merdle； glad to see Bishop； glad to see Bar； glad to see
Physician； glad to see Tite Barnacle； glad to see Chorus； glad to
see Ferdinand his private secretary。 Lord Decimus； though one of the
greatest of the earth； was not remarkable for ingratiatory manners； and
Ferdinand had coached him up to the point of noticing all the fellows
he might find there； and saying he was glad to see them。 When he had
achieved this rush of vivacity and condescension； his Lordship posed
himself into the picture after Cuyp； and made a third cow in the group。
Bar； who felt that he had got all the rest of the jury and must now lay
hold of the Foreman； soon came sidling up； double eye…glass in hand。 Bar
tendered the weather； as a subject neatly aloof from official reserve；
for the Foreman's consideration。 Bar said that he was told （as everybody
always is told； though who tells them； and why； will ever remain a
mystery）； that there was to be no wall…fruit this year。 Lord Decimus
had not heard anything amiss of his peaches； but rather believed； if his
people were correct； he was to have no apples。 No apples？ Bar was lost
in astonishment and concern。 It would have been all one to him； in
reality； if there had not been a pippin on the surface of the earth； but
his show of interest in this apple question was positively painful。
Now； to what； Lord Decimus……for we troublesome lawyers loved to gather
information； and could never tell how useful it might prove to us……to
what； Lord Decimus； was this to be attributed？ Lord Decimus could not
undertake to propound any theory about it。 This might have stopped
another man； but Bar； sticking to him fresh as ever； said； 'As to pears；
now？'
Long after Bar got made Attorney…General； this was told of him as
a master…stroke。 Lord Decimus had a reminiscence about a pear…tree
formerly growing in a garden near the back of his dame's house at Eton；
upon which pear…tree the only joke of his life perennially bloomed。 It
was a joke of a pact and portable nature； turning on the difference
between Eton pears and Parliamentary pairs； but it was a joke； a refined
relish of which would seem to have appeared to Lord Decimus impossible
to be had without a thorough and intimate acquaintance with the tree。
Therefore； the story at first had no idea of such a tree； sir； then
gradually found it in winter； carried it through the changing season；
saw it bud； saw it blossom； saw it bear fruit； saw the fruit ripen； in
short； cultivated the tree in that diligent and minute manner before it
got out of the bed…room window to steal the fruit； that many thanks had
been offered up by belated listeners for the trees having been planted
and grafted prior to Lord Decimus's time。 Bar's interest in apples was
so overtopped by the wrapt suspense in which he pursued the changes
of these pears； from the moment when Lord Decimus solemnly opened with
'Your mentioning pears recalls to my remembrance a pear…tree；' down to
the rich conclusion； 'And so we pass； through the various changes
of life； from Eton pears to Parliamentary pairs；' that he had to go
down…stairs with Lord Decimus； and even then to be seated next to him
at table in order that he might hear the anecdote out。 By that time； Bar
felt that he had secured the Foreman； and might go to dinner with a good
appetite。
It was a dinner to provoke an appetite； though he had not had one。 The
rarest dishes； sumptuously cooked and sumptuously served； the choicest
fruits； the most exquisite wines； marvels of workmanship in gold and
silver； china and glass； innumerable things delicious to the senses of
taste； smell； and sight； were insinuated into its position。 O； what
a wonderful man this Merdle； what a great man； what a master man； how
blessedly and enviably endowed……in one word； what a rich man！
He took his usual poor eighteenpennyworth of food in his usual
indigestive way； and had as little to say for himself as ever a
wonderful man had。 Fortunately Lord Decimus was one of those sublimities
who have no occasion to be talked to； for they can be at any time
sufficiently occupied with the contemplation of their own greatness。
This enabled the bashful young Member to keep his eyes open long enough
at a time to see his dinner。 But； whenever Lord Decimus spoke； he shut
them again。
The agreeable young Barnacle； and Bar； were the talkers of the party。
Bishop would have been exceedingly agreeable also； but that his
innocence stood in his way。 He was so soon left behind。 When there was
any little hint of anything being in the wind； he got lost directly。
Worldly affairs were too much for him； he couldn't make them out at all。
This was observable when Bar said； incidentally； that he was happy to
have heard that we were soon to have the advantage of enlisting on
the good side； the sound and plain sagacity……not demonstrative or
ostentatious； but thoroughly sound and practical……of our friend Mr
Sparkler。
Ferdinand Barnacle laughed； and said oh yes； he believed so。 A vote was
a vote； and always acceptable。
Bar was sorry to miss our good friend Mr Sparkler to…day； Mr Merdle。
'He is away with Mrs Merdle；' returned that gentleman； slowly ing
out of a long abstraction； in the course of which he had been fitting a
tablespoon up his sleeve。 'It is not indispensable for him to be on the
spot。'
'The magic name of Merdle；' said Bar； with the jury droop； 'no doubt
will suffice for all。'
'Why……yes……I believe so；' assented Mr Merdle； putting the spoon aside；
and clumsily hiding each of his hands in the coat…cuff of the other
hand。 'I believe the people in my interest down there will not make any
difficulty。'
'Model people！' said Bar。 'I am glad you approve of them；' said Mr
Merdle。
'And the people of those other two places； now；' pursued Bar； with a
bright twinkle in his keen eye； as it slightly turned in the direction
of his magnificent neighbour； 'we lawyers are always curious； always
inquisitive； always picking up odds and ends for our patchwork minds；
since there is no knowing when and where they may fit into some
corner；……the people of those other two places now？ Do they yield so
laudably to the vast and cumulative influence of such enterprise and
such renown； do those little rills bee absorbed so quietly
and easily； and； as it were by the influence of natural laws； so
beautifully； in the swoop of the majestic stream as it flows upon its
wondrous way enriching the surrounding lands； that their course is
perfectly to be calculated； and distinctly to be predicated？'
Mr Merdle； a little troubled by Bar's eloquence； looked fitfully about
the nearest salt…cellar for some moments； and then said hesitating：
'They are perfectly aware； sir； of their duty to Society。 They will
return anybody I send to them for that purpose。'
'Cheering to know；' said Bar。 'Cheering to know。'
The three places in question were three little rotten holes in this
Island； containing three little ignorant； drunken； guzzling； dirty；
out…of…the…way constituencies； that had reeled into Mr Merdle's pocket。
Ferdinand Barnacle laughed in his easy way； and airily said they were
a nice set of fellows。 Bishop； mentally perambulating among paths of
peace； was altogether swallowed up in absence of mind。
'Pray；' asked Lord Decimus； casting his eyes around the table； 'what
is this story I have heard of a gentleman long confined in a debtors'
prison proving to be of a wealthy family； and having e into the
inheritance of a large sum of money？ I have met with a variety of
allusions to it。 Do you know anything of it； Ferdinand？'
'I only know this much；' said Ferdinand； 'that he has given the
Department with which I have the honour to be associated；' this
sparkling young Barnacle threw off the phrase sportively； as who should
say； We know all about these forms of speech； but we must keep it up；
we must keep the game alive； 'no end of trouble； and has put us into
innumerable fixes。'
'Fixes？' repeated Lord Decimus； with a majestic pausing and pondering
on the word that made the bashful Member shut