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The secret was safe now！ She could keep her own part of it from him； he
should never know of her loss； in time to e he should know all that
was of import to himself； but he should never know what concerned her
only。 That was all passed； all forgiven； all forgotten。
'Now； my dear Miss Dorrit；' said Mr Meagles； 'I am a man of business……or
at least was……and I am going to take my measures promptly； in that
character。 Had I better see Arthur to…night？'
'I think not to…night。 I will go to his room and ascertain how he is。
But I think it will be better not to see him to…night。'
'I am much of your opinion； my dear；' said Mr Meagles； 'and therefore
I have not been any nearer to him than this dismal room。 Then I shall
probably not see him for some little time to e。 But I'll explain what
I mean when you e back。'
She left the room。 Mr Meagles； looking through the bars of the window；
saw her pass out of the Lodge below him into the prison…yard。 He said
gently； 'Tattycoram； e to me a moment； my good girl。'
She went up to the window。
'You see that young lady who was here just now……that little； quiet；
fragile figure passing along there； Tatty？ Look。 The people stand out
of the way to let her go by。 The men……see the poor； shabby fellows……pull
off their hats to her quite politely； and now she glides in at that
doorway。 See her； Tattycoram？'
'Yes； sir。'
'I have heard tell； Tatty； that she was once regularly called the child
of this place。 She was born here； and lived here many years。
I can't breathe here。 A doleful place to be born and bred in；
Tattycoram？'
'Yes indeed； sir！'
'If she had constantly thought of herself； and settled with herself that
everybody visited this place upon her； turned it against her； and cast
it at her； she would have led an irritable and probably an useless
existence。 Yet I have heard tell； Tattycoram； that her young life has
been one of active resignation； goodness； and noble service。 Shall I
tell you what I consider those eyes of hers； that were here just now； to
have always looked at； to get that expression？'
'Yes； if you please； sir。'
'Duty； Tattycoram。 Begin it early； and do it well； and there is no
antecedent to it； in any origin or station； that will tell against us
with the Almighty； or with ourselves。'
They remained at the window； Mother joining them and pitying the
prisoners； until she was seen ing back。 She was soon in the room； and
remended that Arthur； whom she had left calm and posed； should not
be visited that night。
'Good！' said Mr Meagles； cheerily。 'I have not a doubt that's best。 I
shall trust my remembrances then； my sweet nurse； in your hands； and I
well know they couldn't be in better。 I am off again to…morrow morning。'
Little Dorrit； surprised； asked him where？
'My dear；' said Mr Meagles； 'I can't live without breathing。 This place
has taken my breath away； and I shall never get it back again until
Arthur is out of this place。'
'How is that a reason for going off again to…morrow morning？'
'You shall understand；' said Mr Meagles。 'To…night we three will put up
at a City Hotel。 To…morrow morning； Mother and Tattycoram will go down
to Twickenham； where Mrs Tickit； sitting attended by Dr Buchan in the
parlour…window； will think them a couple of ghosts； and I shall go
abroad again for Doyce。 We must have Dan here。 Now； I tell you； my love；
it's of no use writing and planning and conditionally speculating upon
this and that and the other； at uncertain intervals and distances； we
must have Doyce here。 I devote myself at daybreak to…morrow morning； to
bringing Doyce here。 It's nothing to me to go and find him。 I'm an old
traveller； and all foreign languages and customs are alike to me……I
never understand anything about any of 'em。 Therefore I can't be put
to any inconvenience。 Go at once I must； it stands to reason； because
I can't live without breathing freely； and I can't breathe freely until
Arthur is out of this Marshalsea。 I am stifled at the present moment；
and have scarcely breath enough to say this much； and to carry this
precious box down…stairs for you。'
They got into the street as the bell began to ring； Mr Meagles carrying
the box。 Little Dorrit had no conveyance there： which rather surprised
him。 He called a coach for her and she got into it； and he placed the
box beside her when she was seated。 In her joy and gratitude she kissed
his hand。
'I don't like that； my dear；' said Mr Meagles。 'It goes against my
feeling of what's right； that YOU should do homage to ME……at the
Marshalsea Gate。'
She bent forward； and kissed his cheek。
'You remind me of the days；' said Mr Meagles； suddenly drooping……'but
she's very fond of him； and hides his faults； and thinks that no
one sees them……and he certainly is well connected and of a very good
family！'
It was the only fort he had in the loss of his daughter； and if he
made the most of it； who could blame him？
CHAPTER 34。 Gone
On a healthy autumn day； the Marshalsea prisoner； weak but otherwise
restored； sat listening to a voice that read to him。 On a healthy autumn
day； when the golden fields had been reaped and ploughed again； when the
summer fruits had ripened and waned； when the green perspectives of hops
had been laid low by the busy pickers； when the apples clustering in the
orchards were russet； and the berries of the mountain ash were crimson
among the yellowing foliage。 Already in the woods； glimpses of the hardy
winter that was ing were to be caught through unaccustomed openings
among the boughs where the prospect shone defined and clear； free from
the bloom of the drowsy summer weather； which had rested on it as the
bloom lies on the plum。 So； from the seashore the ocean was no longer to
be seen lying asleep in the heat； but its thousand sparkling eyes were
open； and its whole breadth was in joyful animation； from the cool sand
on the beach to the little sails on the horizon； drifting away like
autumn…tinted leaves that had drifted from the trees。 Changeless and
barren； looking ignorantly at all the seasons with its fixed； pinched
face of poverty and care； the prison had not a touch of any of these
beauties on it。 Blossom what would； its bricks and bars bore uniformly
the same dead crop。 Yet Clennam； listening to the voice as it read to
him； heard in it all that great Nature was doing； heard in it all the
soothing songs she sings to man。 At no Mother's knee but hers had he
ever dwelt in his youth on hopeful promises； on playful fancies； on
the harvests of tenderness and humility that lie hidden in the
early…fostered seeds of the imagination； on the oaks of retreat from
blighting winds； that have the germs of their strong roots in nursery
acorns。
But； in the tones of the voice that read to him； there were memories of
an old feeling of such things； and echoes of every merciful and loving
whisper that had ever stolen to him in his life。
When the voice stopped； he put his hand over his eyes； murmuring that
the light was strong upon them。
Little Dorrit put the book by； and presently arose quietly to shade
the window。 Maggy sat at her needlework in her old place。 The light
softened； Little Dorrit brought her chair closer to his side。
'This will soon be over now； dear Mr Clennam。 Not only are Mr Doyce's
letters to you so full of friendship and encouragement； but Mr Rugg says
his letters to him are so full of help； and that everybody （now a little
anger is past） is so considerate； and speaks so well of you； that it
will soon be over now。'
'Dear girl。 Dear heart。 Good angel！'
'You praise me far too much。 And yet it is such an exquisite pleasure
to me to hear you speak so feelingly； and to……and to see；' said Little
Dorrit； raising her eyes to his； 'how deeply you mean it； that I cannot
say Don't。'
He lifted her hand to his lips。
'You have been here many； many times； when I have not seen you； Little
Dorrit？'
'Yes； I have been here sometimes when I have not e into the room。'
'Very often？'
'Rather often；' said Little Dorrit； timidly。
'Every day？'
'I think；' said Little Dorrit； after hesitating； 'that I have been here
at least twice every day。' He mi